My favorite quote comes from actress- Sophia Loren. She once said, “When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child”. Maybe she should have started it by saying, “When you are a GOOD mother…” because after watching Monday’s episode of Intervention featuring two men in distress with raging addictions, it made it clear that a mother’s love may not conquer all, but can conquer a lot, and prevent even more. For the sixty minutes of the show we learned about flight attendant, Joe. He agreed to be followed around because of his alcoholism. Although he agreed to be in a documentary, he believed that he didn’t suffer from being an alcoholic and that no matter what; he would always be fine. We also followed around a husband and father of two boys, Dionicio. Dionicio was addicted to heroin, and has panhandled and done drugs for the past sixteen years. Although these men had two different addictions, their conflict stemmed from the same root- their mothers.
Joe was said to be a very vibrant, and happy child. We met his sister, and learned of his younger brother, who was mentally handicapped and occupied much of his mother’s time. After realizing that her son would never be normal it seemed as though something switched in her brain and she no longer was the loving, happy mother who wanted an entourage of children. She yelled in Joe’s face, calling him names and making him feel worthless. She even went on to say as much as she wished that it had been Joe that been disabled and not his brother. He was beaten emotionally and mentally and after graduating college and going on to become a flight attendant his drinking pulled him down full force. What started out as partying with co-workers and friends soon turned to alarms going off to friends and family members that Joe had a drinking problem. Not only did he drink excessively, but he lived a dangerous lifestyle of driving drunk on his motorcycle and crashing it numerous times. He has been hospitalized over twenty times and has broken so many bones that I don’t even think that he can keep count. He has also been arrested a number of times and still denies that he has a drinking problem. When his concerned sister came to him about his addiction he could only focus on her flaws of binge eating, and not dealing with her problems in a healthy way. It seemed as though helping him was a helpless effort and nothing would make him change his ways.
Dionicio grew up around family and friends, and was beginning to be beat by his mother at a young age. The woman that was to be his comfort and security turned out to be someone that he couldn’t even trust enough to take care of him. He was molested at a young age, and wouldn’t even admit that to the camera, it was a family member that filled in the blanks. Feeling guilty, lost and ashamed, he turned to drugs and gang members during his teen years. He was trying to make a name for himself and fit in anywhere possible. Although choosing that type of lifestyle you could see that he was a good man who wanted good things but couldn’t get over the pain he had endured throughout his childhood. He married his best friend, and they had two boys. Both boys knew of their father’s addiction and were afraid for him and what could happen to not only their father’s future but theirs as well. His extended family were as supportive as his wife and children and I was really rooting for Dionicio to get better. When he spoke of his addiction and admitted the problems he had his eyes would tear up and I felt as helpless as he looked.
- Joe and Dionicio (Watch Episode Here)
Both men were faced with the decision of going to get help for themselves and they both agreed to go. Joe left for treatment still claiming that he didn’t have a problem, but felt proud that his sister admitted to having her own issues, and she was going to get help for herself. I think he left for rehab feeling as though this is something that he HAD to do not something he WANTED to do. He left his treatment early and relapsed right away. He continues to drink, and believes that no matter what happens he will be fine. Dionicio accepted treatment and stayed the whole time. His family went to the Betty Ford Family Center and received help as well. Dionicio came home after rehab and relapsed numerous times. As I have said before, I don’t believe that someone with such a strong addiction that goes to get help can ever go home. I believe you need to start a new life, away from the one that held you down for so long. He finally found help at a methadone clinic and has not used heroin since April of 2010. I hope Dionicio can stay clean for his family and for the man inside of him that I know he is capable of being. As for Joe, I don’t know that anything could help. I believe that by the time he realizes what a problem he has, it will be too late, and he will be either paralyzed from an accident or on his death bed saying goodbye to the family and friends who tried so desperately to help him.
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Heather lives on the the West Coast, and enjoys keeping up with entertainment news, current events, and her family.