Vinny! Blue Balls! Mumbling!
September 17, 2010 in Drama, Features (BSWatch & Users), Jersey Shore, Reality, Shows You're Not Watching
This Thursday’s episode of “Jersey Shore” was technically a repeat, since it was originally broadcast prior to the MTV Music Awards. Plenty of coverage of that show would have been covered on our sister site, theworstshowsyouarewatching.com, but it doesn’t exist. It was a whole bunch of Gagas and Biebers and other…things that need to be beat with a thick metal pole. But enough about why I’m not allowed to play tetherball for life.
The previous episode ended with Angelina and Vinny exchanging bodily fluids. She got chewed out by everyone else in the house, particularly Situation, who alternated between his “worst psychiatrist ever” schtick that he’s been perfecting for most of the season and tossing off a bunch of unfunny one-liners that everyone laughed at. Everyone’s problem rested with the fact that Angelina already had a boyfriend–Jose–and most of the house actually liked him. Situation eventually pressured Angelina into telling Jose about what happened, which she deflected by referring to it as “hooking up”, which could stand for a lot of things. I will reiterate my belief that all of these people likely feel like morons now that their dirty laundry has been aired on one of the most popular television shows of the past couple of years. Fortunately, that’s THEIR problem, not ours.
Vinny’s family showed up to make food and pinch his cheeks, but stayed for our entertainment. Vinny’s mother fulfilled several ethnic stereotypes at once, but it was passed off as an Italian thing. By my count, Greeks, Lebanese, and now Italians can be described as “insulted if you don’t finish their dish” (while English descendents undereat). Ahhh, racism. Vinny’s uncle, Uncle Nino, also turned up, and he was a beacon of light by just showing up. He speaks as though he was struck by lightning while overdosing on Ritalin, and he looks like a taller version of Leisure Suit Larry. Just, you know, without a leisure suit. And he didn’t find himself in a hilarious sexual predicament. There’s always next season, though.
In truth, this was Vinny’s episode. In addition to members of his family showing off, Vinny met the girl of his dreams working in a strip club (which means that she’s really good at her job). Vinny got himself cleaned up to go on a date with the girl, but unfortunately, she cancelled. Fortunately, she uncancelled! Unfortunately, she cancelled again. And that’s how the episode ended–with the most likeable member of the cast deeply hurt by someone that he built up in his mind. Hope you liked your lead-in, Eminem and Rihanna!
Next week, more stupid s*** happens, JWoww’s boyfriend acts like a little bitch, and Angelina picks a fight with Situation. I say let them fight. If they kill each other, then the world will be a brighter place.
Related posts: